well i have been extremely lazy these past few months else how come i could not have updated my blog during this period of extreme happenings :P .. well i could give the excuse of being busy but then who am i kidding .. staying awake till 4 o clock in the morn seems to be pretty much the norm these days . i still remember the other day . my mom was getting up 2 get my sis readied for school and here was i going 2 sleep . well when people say i am getting used to the US timings i am like ya .. but truth s i still have no idea for the sleepless nights .
am i scared , am i getting cold feet . dunno . never really thought about it . right now all that goes on my mind is ohmg i forgot 2 get my nail cutter . one night i found myself making a post it on my shelf reminding me to get a headphones after being reminded of it in my sleep . think am going nuts!!
.. it just hit me the other day when i left the library returning my books , the good old times when i can read some 4 novels into the night s no longer possible . maybe ya when i am retired and have a good old sea side house ( a gal can dream right) .
its not the studies that s giving me the nightmares ( meaning the sleepless nights for a person like me whose top priorities include good food and sleep it s a nightmare basically ) but ya the fact my entire future has become a blank space with what happens next a big q . granted 2 yrs of studies . but after that ... but how will it be ? how will the new country be ? people ? friends will they be close ? and ya the big picture . assistant ships / internships / economy / JOBS
giving up my cts offer s so far the biggest gamble i have ever taken in my life . will i look back later and say cha man i should have taken it up no matter how the position would have been . will i regret being over ambitious as one person put it . should hav been content in india . well i will never know because the tickets have been booked , the bags packed ( well just an expression i am yet 2 start it thats a completely diff story ).
most of all more than anything its the past thats makes me sad . leaving my college was not at all tough . farewell was just like an other event . photos + sarees + running a train :P . and ya the tour wayanand . so much happened in the past few months that i never even can recollect all of it . all i can remember s lots of laughter and then even more laugther . ( ksh voda crackle jokes / vodu machi / midnightt walks --- damn i miss u so much di ) so many things so little time . now that i sit on friendship day .. with midnight wishes from archuu i am like damn four yrs was not enough . it might be cliched but if i could go back again i would gladly do my 4 yrs all over again.
now while writing down this that am overwhelmed . ya thats the word !! what i started out writing the blog for s now completely changed :P its become a memoir of sorts . but thats how thk of the past 4 yrs s . a flood of memories . the pranks / the jokes / the comfortable silences/ the innumerable bakwas .
i thk no matter how gr8 my col life at tamu would be . it will fall short of what i had here .
i want to type something more but for once dont know what it is . i know i should pen down all the crazy things that we did or atleast give it a good ending . but then all i can say s ya maybe sometime els . but for now all i can do is look at my monitor with teary eyes with no more words .
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